Spikes Pointed In

in ,

11x14”
Acrylic on Canvas
2022
Available

The mask gets thick, and I fill the cracks with mud until I can’t recognize myself. I’m spiky, but the spikes are pointed in, and every time I move, they poke in further. Many of the things that I thought were shining facets of my soul were actually prismatic fractures of shattered glass.

Struggling with chronic mental health problems is absolutely exhausting. It’s been a fight ever since I was a kid to not succumb to my darkest thoughts, and the idea that this will continue on for as long as I inhabit this body gets so daunting and exhausting that sometimes I wonder how I’m gonna make it and find any kind of lasting tranquility or healing in it…

On the flip side… I feel like my experiences in shadow inform my understanding of the beauty of light and allow me to feel it in a way that a lot of people struggle to, and that’s the beauty I try to capture in my art… those moments of shining clarity are the ones that I continue dredging through the mud for… I guess they do say beauty hurts, huh?

2022